How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

Your mother is so fat that I suggest she should pay a visit to the nutritionist so they can work out a dieting plan together to prevent weight-related heart problems in the near future.

A guy at a baseball game....

What did the resently released criminal get for his birthday? a nice sweater

What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

Q: What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We are both lawyers.

Hey connor and brett its ben, you are both at my house

Skrillex.

what's the difference between dodo and doodoo doodoo is still around for you to see

Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

What's the difference between a leopard and a jaguar ? The rabbit flies faster, while the pigeon can breathe underwater.

What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

LA Police, Christine Collins called. She wants her son back.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

ert

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

What's brown, sticky, green, yellow, and orange that rides a unicycle? I have no clue, that's why I asked.

p lkl

I got on a bus, and immediately found that sitting on a bus is boring. I will never climb on top of a bus again.

Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...