There was 3 floors in a building. The man outside was watering plants. The man on the first floor was doing laundry. The man on the second floor was peeing out the window because the toilet wasn't working. The man on the third floor was cutting vegetables and accidentally dropped his knife out the window. Now, the four men all went out to tell what they did that day. The man on the third floor said that he was cutting veggies and dropped his knife out the window. The man on the second floor said that he got his wiener cut off. The man on the first floor said that he was just doing laundry. Then, the man outside said that he was watering plants and found a delicious sausage on the ground and he ate it.

Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

What's the funniest thing about this website? Everyone thinks their fucking hilarious because they keep making jokes about Sally who has no goddamn arms and little kids with terminal cancer

Q: What did Mr. Spoke say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

You know why Michael J. Fox makes really good milkshakes? ... because he uses the best ingredients

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Bryson got a concussion...he died

Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road. Because roads were not invented then dumbass.

What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

What do you call a man running away from the bus? A man

why did the chicken cross the street i dont know thats why im asking you

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

your brother so fine that hes skinney

Why did the witch stay up all night with a broken broomstick? Because she couldn't sweep.

good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

Why were accents created? So when people go to Texas they come back sounding like a D-Bag.

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb One because lawyers are usually well educated and know how to screw in a lightbulb

Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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