A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

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What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

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Why did the women sleep in the kitchen. Due to the poverty levels of her area of residence, sub-sahara Africa, she, her 7 children and 3 orphaned nephews lived in one ram shackled room with a corrugated iron roof which served as a multi-purpose kitchen, bedroom, lounge and greeting area.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead How did the second koala fall out of the tree? it was hit by the first one how did the third koala fall out of the tree? it thought it was a game and jumped off

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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What did Robin say to Justin Beiber? You're gay. Angus L.

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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Q: What did the doctor say to the man with terminal cancer? A: You have terminal cancer.

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Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

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Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and in turn wasting money

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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Your dad is so gay, he lovingly marries another man and selflessly adopts you.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He has to on his commute to work. He is a taxpaying citizen who does his 8-5 job to try and cut out a decent living for his wife and kids, so stop questioning the route that he takes to get to work.

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your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

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what do women and men have in common? nothing, women are inferior

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops