what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than beating a dead horse? Nothing. Beating a horse is just too much fun

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A dog was driving his car down the road right? Wrong dogs can't drive cars

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man says to another man, "Why the long face?" He then replies, "I have an elongated face, hands, and feet due to acromegaly."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

thumb_up thumb_down -17

2 girls talking to each other: brunette: Christmas is on Friday this year blonde: let's hope its not on Friday the 13th!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo mama so fat, she should see a doctor to discuss healthier lifestyles.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

thumb_up thumb_down -17

y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a horse is a horse. of course of course....unless its a cow

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why can't the Mexican float? He never learned the proper technique as he was not allowed to take swim class.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

roses are red, violates are blue, you left me for David, I am about to kill you *bam* *bam**bam*

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did the Mexican shoot himself? because his wife miscarried, hung herself, and his oldest brother had cancer. also when he was 5, his parents died in a car accident, leaving his abusive uncle to care for him. he also had erectile dysfunction which caused him severe pain. did i mention he was an illegal, homeless immigrant who was addicted to methamphedimine and owed several million dollars to a man who repeatedly raped him anally? he was.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what did the dead man say to the other dead man ...nothing he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the snappy dresser take a button off of a coat? To see a button fly! NO YOU IDIOT YOU DID IT WRONG, IT'S SUPPOSED TO ABOUT ABOUT A "BUTTER FLY" OMG YOU DOLT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops