How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

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what did the paraplegic man get for Christmas? a unicycle

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What do you call a black guy with a job? Responsible.

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A Jew, a black guy, and a redneck are walking down the street because their car broke down a few miles back.

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I was raped oh no he's coming HELP ahhhhhhhhfkaek.k.k.k.k.k.k. vmruieao3 vxm v

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME

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What did the worm say to the butterfly? Nothing, worms don't talk.

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What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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A Nazi walks into a bar. No one really knows he's a Nazi and he doesn't talk about it that much in public, so he chats to some people then leaves after a few beers...

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Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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A horse walks into a bar the barmam asks why the long face The horse replies he's suffering from depression after his family was killed in a car crash and he has now turned to alcohol to sort his sorrows

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Stop making 9/11 jokes their just plane unfunny

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a headache OUCH!

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

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Where did the girl go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

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What were Benjamin Franklin's first words after he died? It's been 225 years and we still don't know yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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