What's black and white and red all over? An embarrassed skunk.

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Lets just say that we are beyond the stage where I am "just" trying, by the way, you might want to search that last comment for double negatives. Or you know NOT NOT. Do not take my word for it, but if I am not wrong, the bacteria (yogurt) leaves afterwards, so you are eating milk that has been eaten and then.. You know... A common "side effect" of hypnosis, is that when it is used, the one hypnotized (both in this case) end up feeling a "strange" case of closeness, stronger bonds, friendship etc, scientists wonder why... ITS LIKE DUH! WE BOTH REVEAL DEEP SECRETS TO EACH OTHER! THINGS WE DO NOT EVEN USUALLY TELL OURSELVES! Its a literal no brainer, scientits can go fuck themselves, because as far as I know, thats the only fuck they ever get.

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Whats two plus two? Miles

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

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Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

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what happened when a duck flew over the hunter during duck hunting season? the hunter shot at the bird, but fortunately, the hunter was nit very good so the duck flew back to his wife and children by the pond.

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What was the baker a coward? He didn't have the "Bunz" to prove it!

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So, a screw driver walks into a bar, and the bar tender sais "Hey Screw Driver" we have a drink named after you" the screw driver goes, "Really? You have a drink named Bob"

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KNOCK KNOCK WHOSE THERE? AVOCADO AVOCADO WHO AVOCADO COLD THAT'S A RETARD JOKE HAHAHAHAHA GOOD 1

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean????? What Nothing they just waved ???? Oh Do you sea what I did there ???? No I'm shore you did ???? By Erin

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Q: how many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: two, one to hold the ladder securely and the other to screw in the lightbulb.

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Why did the horse insult the postage stamp? He didn't. Horses can not speak English nor can anything verbally or physically critique a postage stamp and make it feel any emotional distress.

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An eagle and a mouse sat on a tree branch, watching a farmer walk to the pasture to milk his cows. The eagle then turned to the mouse but said nothing, because eagles cannot speak. The eagle then ate the mouse because it was a bird of prey.

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Whats a frogs favorite year? 2009!

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Yo mamma so black, she uses armor all instead of lotion...

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what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

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"Grandpa, How did you know that Grandma was the one?" "When her sister dumbed me."

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what do you call a kid named kid. kid

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Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

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What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

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Knock Knock ............... No one's home.

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Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five fingers The third one's for you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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