A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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So one time there was this woman learning...

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Why did hellen keller's dog kill itself? You would to if your name was, AIIEEEEIUUUUHGH!

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

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What did the black kid down the road get for Christmas? Your Bike.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your heart.

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Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

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Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

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I just threw up..In my pants.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the government, your home is being repossessed.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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whats the difference between a black guy, spook and a porch monkey? they are all stupid, stinky, n-i-g-g-e-r-s!

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a motorboat. They are sucked into the propeller and brutally disfigured instantly.

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What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

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what did the tree say when it fell down? Nothing it is humanly impossible for a tree to talk. Especially after it fell down. I mean that would hurt.

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What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

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THe Election

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What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

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What do a spoon and a platypus have in common? Nothing.

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What's the difference between 15 dead babies and a cadilac? I don't have a cadilac.

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It's a penguin that breathes by its asshole. One day, he sits down, and he dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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