I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! In for a penny, in for a pound. I'm Donald Trump!

You know what they say... Big feet Lawn-mower

A black man walks into a bar. No comments were said to him for everyone else was paying attention to their other peers.

what do you call obama a dumbass

*Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter* Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

I once saw my grandparents making love.. that's why I dont eat raisens

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the farmer let him out, and he found a road to cross!

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

A blind man walks into a wall.

What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

What is white and can fly? A fridge that can't fly.

What did the asian do with his homework? finish it. as is expected from children his age.

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

What do you get when you cross a squirrel and lasagna? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

Why couldn't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has parkinsons and therefore couldn't keep his hand steady.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Released some juice and burst its skin.

NO! Nero created the MULTIVERSE During the sixth day... And on the seventh... He did not get any sleep or rest either...¨ SO THE GREAT EXPLOSION OF ENDORPHIN'S WAS CREATED AND IT WAS GOOD! Moral:"Seriously, get lost, only the trio of the Gods Me,Myself, and I, are worthy of this tribulation!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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