roses are brown violets are brown, who took a shit in my garden

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

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Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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So theres this Jew, right? He got shot to death.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Jokes about the Holocaust

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drew edminstin is a rat

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When Gronkowski spikes the ball, 20 children die.

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What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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What do you call a man who shoots someone? A very bad person.

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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Why did Chuck Norris fall of the cliff? Because he was pushed.

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Knock knock" my mom says not to talk to strangers!"

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What did the young child with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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What do you call the child of a black male and an asian female? A child of mixed ethnicities.

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Somebody else besides you: what time is it? You: what time is what? SOmebody else: ? What?

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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What is a gremlin? A gremlin.

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My mom always said that jumping in a pile of leaves was fun! That was before a 20 foot long iguana bit her head off...

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whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy there were skid marks in front of the dead dog

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Q.why did the monkey fall out the tree? A. it was dead Q. why did the second monkey fall out the tree? A. it was hanging onto the first one Q. why did the third monkey fall out the tree? A. peer pressure

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Yo mamma so black, she uses armor all instead of lotion...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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