What did the dying mother give her newborn child? AIDS

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A blind man walks into a bar After realising he might be hurt everybody rushes to his aid

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what did the women with no arms and legs say to her daughter? go to your room.

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whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

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a woman gets hit by a motorcycle whose fault was it?......... the man's, he shouldn't have driven the motorcycle in the kitchen

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

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How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

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What do you call 17 blondes standing in a row? most certainly not Charles because it seems as though it would be incrediblely unlikley that a girl would be named Charles

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what's worse than than finding a worm up your ass? Death

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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Suzy:I love you like a fat man love cake. Dave:(proceeds to say nothing as he is fat and is buzzy eating cake)

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Why are black people so good at basketball because they can jump shoot and steel

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

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Nah

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Cause she's a woman

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What's long, hard, and full of seamen... A Submarine

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A whore walks in to a bar. She soon finds her John and they leave to his hotel room.

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A Mormon walks into a bar.

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What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? Being raped... What's worse than being raped? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two flies in your soup

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snooki

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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how many pieces of wood can a lumberjack cut in a minute? three dead squrlles a hat and and half of a tree oh and a bus. and if u get in his way alot of guts spewed every where

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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