when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

What did Timmy want for Christmas? Parents.

Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

The dewey decimal system

There was once a guy who was so crazy...he was sectioned.

Hey! What dhujv hushichk jgdwrggy man? Go home Sally, you're drunk

Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 3, according to Mr. Owl

Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

2001, 2 airplains fly into the world trait centers. the pilots then had their licences taken away.

Why did the astronaut drop his toolbox? Because he ran out of air.

What did jonah say to your mum ... Nothing jonah is your mum

Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.It is a very simple task for somebody who knows what to do.

How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

this website even though its hilarious.

Q: What's the best way to eat lasagna A: With a fork, although a spoon is a fine substitute

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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