Why did the n i g g e r steal money? because he was black! and wanted a KFC thanksgiving! :)

A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Do you know what is worse than getting kicked downstairs? Getting kicked upstairs because then you could fall downstairs and break your skull.

How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

Why did the girl scream for help? She was being raped.

:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

Gay's

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the gay's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

Rose's are red, violets are red, trees are red, bushes are red, oh God the garden's on fire.

Why didn't the teen girl get to her appointment? A) She woke up late.

Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

What's do a woman's vagina and a camel's toe have in common? Other than being parts of two mammals, they have nothing in common.

How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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