What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

How do you get 500 babies into one bathtub? a blender. How do you get them out? NACHOOOS

Why did the man look up into the sky? carrot cake

what do mexicans and grass have in common You find them both in your front yard

What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

Q. What's brown and circular? A. MEATBALLS!

*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

Atheism

Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

A muslin walks into a bar, and has the same equal rights as everyone else and orders a pint of fosters.

roses are red violets are blue cookie monster is gonna eat you big bird is yellow you look mellow dont forget elmo to

8--------------------- penis

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

What have the TV programmes Shameless, The Jeremy Kyle Show and Benidorm all have in common? They are all examples of modern British society

Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

One day a woman wrote a letter to her husband whom was at war. He received it, read it, and was happy to know she was thinking of him.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

whats the difference between me and callum ? one soul.

Why is a chicken coupe, a coupe not a sedan? Because a sedan would have four doors.

Q: Whats worse than finding 10 babies in a trash can? A: Finding 1 baby in 10 trash cans!

What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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