What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

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A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

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roses are red violets r blue jump off a building no one likes u

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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Why should you never trust anglers? Because they're always into fishy business... Why should you never trust hunters? Because they carry loaded guns...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

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A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

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Why did Kurt Cobain commit suicide? Because it was drug related

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Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

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A Horse walks into a Bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The Horse had cancer.

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Q: How do you make a clown frown? A: Hit it with an ax.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

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who killed more poeple than jeffory dommer, john wayne gayce, and ted buny combined cancer

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

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I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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