What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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How do you fit four elephants in a car ? Two in the front and two in the back

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What do you call a Russian man who is on the moon? A cosmonaut

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

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Yo momma is so dumb, the tests came back positive for mental retardation and she has been given an expected life expectancy of 2 years.

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Who is Jim Wonderbread? A whorrible person

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if you want to see somthing funny, throw a small child imbertween two catholic priests!

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I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Marla should be home by now, it's nearly 6." He was unaware he had lost his tractor until the next morning.

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Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

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whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

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So a guy and his monkey walk into a bar I don't remember the rest of the joke but you mom is a whore

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what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

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What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

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What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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Vicky is my best friend.

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You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

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Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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