You're a country without the "tree". Did you just call me a cunt?

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

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your mom is so fat.

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

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what did the man living in the box buy with his new found money? A bigger box.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

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What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

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Ten years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash ... now we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash.

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Thats a real shame. How come your eyes are red to begin with? You can use hypnosis to change the color, but if you never learned how, I am not gonna teach you.

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What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

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What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

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Last night, I went fishing, caught a fish, brought it home, grilled it, ate it, and went to bed.

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I like food. But what's more than that it is necessary for survival. ASIAN!!!!

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What's worse than 10 babies stapled to a tree? The Holocaust.

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops