Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

How many hookers fit in your bed? 12, if you have a king-sized bed, and 8.7 if you have a queen-sized bed.

Q: What's the best way to eat lasagna A: With a fork, although a spoon is a fine substitute

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

A jew was walking down the street what did he see? the holocaust

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a shiny new Cadillac? I don't have a shiny new Cadillac in my garage.

What do you call a black women serving 60 years in prison? A prisoner.

what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon... Michael Jackson has sex with little boys.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

Why did a man get fired from the M&M store? He was color blind.

Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

Yo mama's so ugly, she has difficulty attracting a partner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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