you know whats better than lemonade? sex

a man walks into a bar and has a drink james

A few lice were drinking wine on a scalp. It is quite strange that a person had wine on their scalp.

Women's rights.

Why did the family at dinner not tip the waiter? He was mean and spat in their food.

After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

Why couldn't the 11-year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

People...

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

Did you hear about the man with 3 balls? He liked tennis

What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

why did Helen Keller cross the road? she didn't, she wasn't able to find it

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

Wright flyer

Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

4 strangers are shopping at the mall. The big one does a trick and then the small one was good. The bad was small like a tree, seven days later the short one was having a party with a pretty lady. To the teacher was morning and everyone did happy times.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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