what has small feet? a human being with a tiny proximity of feet matter.

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

Why are watermelons green? 9, because cows like to eat grass.

A priest, a minister and a rabbit were seated next to each other on an airplane. They all had to pay for lunch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wow, I screwed up, Give me head.

Which way do 4 gay guys walk South then past the milkbar then around the corner

A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

besides saying "Oh, Yeah" and punching down walls, what does the kool-aid man do? drink cool aid

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

An American almost walks into a store when he sees a Jew. The Jew was also about to walk into the store, So the american opens the door for him and says"Jew first."

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

why are balck people black because they are

roses are red violets are blue my dick hurts blue waffles

Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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