What's worse than eating a rotton fruit that makes you sick?? Getting raped by a giant jackalope and then being left for dead in the middle of nowhere and being found by an old pedophile whose van ran out of gas and then running away only to find some water but while you were drinking it you got grabbed and dragged under the water by an octopus who has wandered off many miles from its home and then dying because humans don't have gills

Why do you put babies in the blender feet first? To hear them scream.

What do you call a man with no penis? WOahMan! O_o

Who's on first? Garvey.

Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

The Sentence Below Is True The Sentence Above Is False

Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

Why did Jake fall off his bike? His mom threw a fridge at him.

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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