What did the rabbit buy the Jewish duck for Hanukkah? Nothing, animals don't celebrate holidays.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A blind duck walks under a coffee table. Luckily, it was shorter that the table, walked underneath, and continued unharmed. Then it was eaten by a cat it couldn't see.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he was laughing so hard at the man who farted and burped at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Penis Gabriel - Go eat some ice cream! Boner McDaniels - No. Penis Gabriel - Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

sure!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

"knock knock" "whos there?" "pizza delivery!"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is worst than 1 baby dead in a microwave? 2 babies dead in the same microwave !

thumb_up thumb_down -24

pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man is talking with his friend when suddenly he picks up a banana. He starts talking with the banana, and after a while of conversing the man sadly puts down his banana and says to his friend, "I'm sorry but your son has just died in a horrible accident."

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Pooring urine into your eyes, is a natural way to cure pink eye. Found this out this morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a child with a peg leg, and eye patch, and no hand? Names

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops