Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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Your momma's so fat that when she looked in the mirror she broke down crying and threw up in the toilet because she is belemic.

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Everyone always gets up in arms over human trafficking... ... Well I kind of enjoy the convenience of air travel and so on.

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Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

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I can't believe they been together for 16 years!! Who? Deez Nutz!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

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Internet Explorer

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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A dinosaur walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender goes home and tells his wife what he saw. His wife leaves him.

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A horse walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything or say anything because it is a horse. It proceeds to walk around and knock over a few tables before finding the door.

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Whats brown and can't ride a bike? A lampshade.

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What did you get for your birthday? I got older

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what did the pornography filmer say to the asain man as he was having sex? im taking a highly pixelated recording of you and your partner engaging in sexual intercourse

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What's the difference between 15 dead babies and a cadilac? I don't have a cadilac.

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It's a penguin that breathes by its asshole. One day, he sits down, and he dies.

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What's purple and tastes like grapes? Grapes

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why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

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Why was the little African child sad? He had recently been denied an education only 4 days after witnessing his mother being raped and cut in half by a machete. ....he also had aids. ......and was in Africa.

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, I like Tities and so do you

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Bend over Touch your toes I'll show you where The monster goes

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Why did the man go to the hospital Because he was hurt

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Children + my basement + my finger = yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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