Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? A: Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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why did the baby fall out of the tree? the monkey dropped it. why did the monkey drop the baby? it was dead.

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Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

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retard

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What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Actually a better question would be, why is the chicken near a road in the first place?

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Who was at the door when Helen Keller answered? She doesn't know

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How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

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Why did Lisa spill her drink? Her plane crashed.

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A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

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Why was Timmy sore? He'd been playing with his cornhole along with his friends all day!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

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What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

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A chinchilla and an octopus walk into a bar. What do they say? The octopus says Hello but the chinchilla says nothing because chinchillas cannot talk.

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What's the worse thing O.J. Simpson has gotten away with? Running a red light

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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What did the audience watching inception say at the end ................ WAT THE FUK

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Women's Rights Movement

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There was porn on the Internet I masturbated to it, but my parents caught me, and I can't ever leave the house again until I'm 18.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops