Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

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What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

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knok knok whos there know one cares your gay

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

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What's the difference between a fat man and a little boy? Despite the fact that they were dropped on two different cities, one was made out of uranium, the other was made out of plutonium.

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What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

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Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

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A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

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If youre African, why are you white?

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What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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