Why did the Chicken cross the road? So it would not get hit

There once was a boy. On his birthday, he got a small puppy. The puppy was white and had big eyes. Boy loved his puppy and the puppy loved the boy.

knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

What is mary short for? Mary had an accident with a semi-truck and had to get both of her legs amputated.

Im gay What about you

A bunch of nuns were riding a three-seat bicycle. The seats were comfy and no one complained.

anti jokes are gay...your all gay

Roses are red, Violets are purple.

A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

Netflix and chill

2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

Your face

what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

What do stupid fat ugly women always say to me? “I think you have a problem with women.”

Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

"What starts with an 'F' and ends with 'uck'?" "I don't know, what?" "'Firetruck.'"

What do you call a person without a heart? Not alive.

whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

God

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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