why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

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Slow and steady wins the race, But only in some cases. Mostly never.

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Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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You will NEVER guess what just happened!

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Want to hear a joke? So do I.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

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Guess What!? What?! GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (ALL RIGHT) OH.

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someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

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why couldnt the black man fly, becuse his master said he coudnt.

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Q: whats worse than finding out you failed an exam? A: finding out you where Hitler in a past life

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What did the man think of when he saw a squadron of military bombers flying over his home? The football game is about to start

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9 tottenham fans walk into a french bar 2 minutes later French fans attack them saying this is for making our history lessons boring 1 shouts ohh the holocaust French fans ash him even more 5 say there call the jew squard next minute there getting attacked by a bunch of kids and lying that there were 30 neo Nazi men.

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Roses are red, my name is Dave. This poem makes no sense, microwave

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What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

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Why was the black man out of a job? because he was recently laid off and had not found any job offerings that he would be interested in

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Why did the man fart? He didn't. Stop being so dirty-minded.

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What did the Banana say to the human. Nothing, because bananas are not capable of talking

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DING DONG! Did you have to ring the doorbell? You just ruined a good knock knock joke!

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What did Grandma Sally give Little Timmy for Christmas? Herpes

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whats a great gift to share with small children? Ebola

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

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Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops