What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

Person 1- Ask me if I am a tree Person 2- Ok, are you a tree? Person 1- Nope

ADAM FANTUZZI SUCKS KIRANS BALL SACK

What did the golfer do when he hit a shot with a lot of pressure on him into the water? He dropped another ball and continued on, for golf is a civilized game and bad manners are prohibited.

What do you call an unfunny comment that demeans a group of people? Bigotry

What did it say on the banner for an international dyslexics support group? Dyslexics of the world unite.

Justin Bieber.

What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

Who enforces the law strongly and forces people to obey them? Terrorists that have seized control of a town.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Cause she's a woman

Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

ERROR 3045: This joke has gone bankrupt and Is laying in the hospital//:: THE CAUSE: OBAMA CARE

knock knock, whos there? billy i dont know who you are, please get away from my front door before i call the authorities

What's a joke? Funny

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? 17

Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

What's the difference between a black minister and a white priest? Nothing. We are all equal in the eyes of God.

What's long, hard, and full of seamen... A Submarine

How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

Is it hungry in here? Or is it just me?

In Soviet Russia, the political system was very different than it is today.

What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? Being eaten by a giant octopus. What's worse than being eaten by a giant octopus? 3 Bee Stings!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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