Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Why did the sperm swim back? cos he realised that he was in someones anus!

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A man ate a lot of ice cream he had double bypass surgery 3 months later

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he was laughing so hard at the man who farted and burped at the same time.

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Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

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So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

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Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

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woman's rights

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Why did the black homosexual blind man want to go to the comedy club? He enjoys a good laugh

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Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

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Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

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What colour are blackberries? Purple.

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What did the big traffic light say to the little traffic light? It didnt it's a traffic light.

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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What did the commentor say when he saw the "waht's worse than finding a worm in your apple...the holocaust." joke? I am offended to your cruel referance to worms.

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How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

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Dogs

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Forget about them, do not compare yourself to those beneath you, you always wanted to help as many as possible, in a world where everyone fights for themselves only.

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How do you save a black person from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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Women's Rights.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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My name is Jeff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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