Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

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Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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A man walks into a bar and sees two girls making out. He orders a drink and leaves.

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You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

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Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

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what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms! Knock knock! Who'z there? Not Suzy.

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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A man goes into the doctors office for his yearly checkup. The man waits patiently for several minutes until the doctor is ready to see him. After about ten minutes pass, the doctor is ready to see him. The man enters the doctors office. He passes all of the necessary tests. The doctor and him talk for a while. After a few minutes, the doctor says, "Okay, thanks for coming. See you next year." The man thanks the doctor and leaves.

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Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

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Who kille the Mockingbird? George Bush: i wish i could know the answer for this question, but belive me i am thinking.

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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