Y u do dis?

Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

Q: What is worse than getting stung by a bee? A: Your breath. Please have a mint.

How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

a black man walks out of popeyes

i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis

What's got one leg and no eyes? A leg.

roak

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

What did Hitler say to Obama Nothing because Hitler is dead.

why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

Why did the boy die? He had cancer.

There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

What did the doctor say to the lawyer? Nothing. They weren't even together. He was in the hospital saving people and the lawyer was in his office working on a case.

What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because animals walking across a paved street is a very common occurrence ever since the industrialization of the modern world.

What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

Roses are reddish Violets are bluish If it wasn't for Christmas We'd all be Jewish

If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

Two biscuits were sitting in an oven. One says to the other hows it going, the other says nothing because he knows that biscuits can't talk.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican is human being, and has no simalarities to an average day wooden bench.

whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

Why doesn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it makes him mean.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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