Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

What did the black kid get for christmas? A wii with duel contollers and a 2 year insurance for it incase it gets robbed or damaged

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer procrastinated fixing the latch on the coop. Did his wife warn him this would happen? Yessss! Did he listen? Noooo!

How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

Vote this down and get DOXED

what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

Jack and jill went up a hill to get some water. Jack fell down, twisted his ankle, and continued to roll. He broke his spine and collar bone and he was later taken to the hospital. Later that night he died because the doctors couldn't do anything. Jill then killed herself in mourning.

roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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