Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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how come bob felt 'under pressure'? because somebody dropped a dumpster on him

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whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

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why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

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Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

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Why did the bones cross the street? They didn't. The dogs ate them.

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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What did the lawyer name his daughter? Nothing. The lawyer is sterile and can never have children.

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What do a squirrel and a cigarette have in common? -They are both perfectly harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

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Yo mamma is so fat, that she's going on a diet and is exercising regularly to lose wait.

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What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

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a black man is chasing a white man,, "sir you dropped your wallet'!!

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? I don't know. I cant think f anything big and white that fall from trees that can kill you and besides if it is big enough to kill you then you will likely see it and avoid the section of that tree lest the big white object should fall and kill you because of this it is likely that anything that is big and white and falls from trees will in result kill you.

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An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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