Why did the hobo get hit by a bus? He wanted to kill himself.

Do you know what's the sexiest thing in the world? Sex.

What did one penguin say to the other? Flippty-flop-dop-boop-de-bop. Jazzhands.

What did the farmer that lost his tractor say? Wheres my tractor?

Why did the girl drop her vannlia ice cream? Vannlia Ice punched her for being cool as ice.

Cinema greatest shit final, anime and videogames dont translate well into movies edition: One day... a young man named Tyler Reed, is chased by the notorious bully named Peter Ganondorf... Just then... he coincidentally utters "I AM THE LINK!" And a great lightning bolt strikes him... Tyler Becomes THE LINK! As for Peter Ganondorf... he became a pile of burning ashes... But Just then THE LINK, gets contacted by Jessica Fairy! And receives a important message... The evil Dr.Bullshitious has destroyed the connection without earth and planet Zelda! And that is bad... BECAUSE! Can Tyler Reed use his powers of lightning fast flight, and collect the TWO pieces of the mystic "triforce" to earn the ultimate weapon? The Master gun! Most importantly, can he become THE LINK between Planet Zelda and Earth? *Shows random shots that you cant make shit of like those movies you know suck just from the narration* ZELDA: THE LINK TO PLANET EVOLUTION! Moral: Still better than Dragon Ball Evolution...

lipstick pig

Your chicken just went across the road. What does this tell you about the economy?

Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

Q: Whats worse than running out of hot water? A: having wyatt friedman poop on your chest, Hit him up on FB

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

How do Mexicans have sex? They get in bed, and the man puts his dick in his partner's vagina.

Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender immediately shoots it in the face with a double barrel shotgun, ending the rabid animal's life

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.

http://i.imgur.com/BJsbT.jpg

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

What happens when you mix bath salts, marijiuana, and crack cocaine and proceed to inject it into your body in some manner? You have one of the biggest trips of your life in which it will ware off and you will proceed with your life

What did the homless man get for Christmas? Nothing

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

A black man walks into a bar holding a weapon. He is asked to leave to leave because weapons are not allowed in the bar.

What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Sorry, I'm a poof.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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