Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem about Red rosses and blue violets

2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

Why did the Girl fall of the swing? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's There? Not That Girl

A blonde, ginger, and brunette took the SAT. They all performed successfully and were admitted into their colleges of choice.

Why did the little girl not speak? It was Anne Frank

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

why is the man laughing. he isn't, he's just been informed he has testicular cancer.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Knock Knock .....................Oh it was just the TV

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? Because she had no legs.

why do the klu kux klan wear pillowcases on their heads? they were going to go with coon skin but thought it was a little much!!

Kitana vs Shao Kahn. Kitana: HIAHIAHIAHIA...etc Kahn: You weak pathetic whor... OARGH! Kahn: FINISH ME!!! Kitana: Dad? Again? Okay the last time then... Kahn: I just addopted you you FUC... Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh... OOF!! OFF!! OFF!! OFF! Kitana: *slurp okay no more for you I am uh... full, seriously, Ill explode or some other Fatality... Woody Allenality... Kahn: Kontinue? (press start to kontinue free play mode)

What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby wearing a clown suit.

What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Her father beat her

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

What time did the Chinese man go the dentist? About 5 minutes prior to his appointment

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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