A man walks into a bar, ouch!

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Why did Hitler kill so many Jews? Because he didn't like them.

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Obama says: I can throw one 1,000 dollar bill out the window and make one person really happy Michelle says: I can throw ten 100 dollar bills out the window and make ten people really happy The Co-Pilot says: I can throw you both out the window and make 250,000,000 people really happy tee-hee

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

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Roses are black, Violets are black, and I'm blind .

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What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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What did batman say to robin before getting into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile robin.

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Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

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I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

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whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

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world peace

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A man walks into a bar and orders a shot. The bartender asks to see his I.D. The man explains that he had lost his I.D. earlier in the day. The bartender then asked the man to leave, so he left.

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What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

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Q: What did the black man, the white man, the hispanic man, and the english man have in common? A: They all enjoyed broccoli.

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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Whats black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

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What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

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Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

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Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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