What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

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Why was the broom late? Cause he overSWEPT!!! ahahahahahaha!

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

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what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

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how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Why did Dean Jones talk to his car? Because it was Herbie the love bug , a car possessed by a demon that had voice recognition capabilities and thus could understand him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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