A guy walks into a restaurant. "What would you like?" says the waiter. "A glass of orange juice," replies the man.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a large jar filled to the brim with $20 bills. He asks the bartender why there is so much money in the jar, and the bartender tells him that he has a horse in the back of the building, and he has a bet that if someone puts $20 in the jar and can make the horse laugh, then they will win all the money. The man, feeling confident, puts his money into the jar and tries to make the horse laugh. It is a horse, so of course he cannot make it laugh. He leaves, dejectedly, having just wasted 20 of his hard earned dollers.

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This is like another one: Terry is at work eating a cookie.. He drops his cookie. His co worker trys to pick it up, however he accidently stands on it. Turns out terry can keep a grudge, nine years later, he killed his co worker with a shovel.

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What did the electron do after losing his proton? Trough electromagnetical forces, the electron simply left it's atom, making it become a positive ion. Then, atracted by other atom's magnetical force, it joins the other atom's last vallence shell, creating a negative ion, since there are more electrons then protons in the atom in issue.

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whats worse than having a gay friend ? 9/11

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What can fly? Lots of things

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James got up from the couch, forgetting what he got up for he asked his girlfriend, Mary: "What did I get up for again?" Mary replied "To get your medicine for your amnesia."

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belly button

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Well that sucks, your dad is dead.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hold his family at gun point

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Dusters blow stuff.

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A seal walks into a club.

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What's the difference between a mexican and a park bench? One is a minority whose ancestors originally lived in the central american country of Mexico, the other is a useful convenience that provides a place to rest one's legs in a public place.

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Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

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Why did Dom stop smoking? Because he died

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Shea's sty....

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Why did the elephant not do 9/11? Because he drank a hispanic turtle.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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I went to work Got paid, Then came home.

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What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

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What do you do in a one night stand? Stand all night long.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? It's Jim. Jim who? I'm your son, Jim. Are you losing your memory?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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