How do you get a one armed polock out of a tree? You assess the situation and get a ladder the proper size to reach him, making sure the ladder is stable.

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Yo Mama so stupid because she's been addicted to marijuana since she was a teenager, and has lost many brain cells. Resulting in her forgetting simple things like your birthday, her own name, etc. She has also developed lung cancer. She's predicted to die in two months if she continues to smoke as she does now.

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"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

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;iub

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Q: How do you make sweet sexy love to cow and make her come several times and then have her lick your stick clean without nobody ever finding out? While secretly keeping her as your girlfriend forever? A: Wouldn't you like to know...

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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Q:Why did sarah fall off the swing? A:She had no arms. 1:Knock knock 2:who's there? 1:not sarah

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If life though you lemons, through skittles at them and say tast the freakin rainbow.

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How many gay people does it take to make a football team? 11

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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what is the difference between a boy scout and a jew? boy scouts come back from camp.

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Chuck Norris screams in pain.

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If only i were a man! You not! Your a.... WO-MAN!

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Me Neither.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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What do an elephant and a plum have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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Why did susie fall off the swing? Because an arrow penetrated her head.

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Knock Knock, Whos there? a baby nailed to the wall Orgasim

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What's an example of something quiet? Helen Keller.

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What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

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What is a 6.9? A period getting in the way of a good time!

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roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

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Q: What's worse than falling off a mountain A: Falling off a mountain into a pile of spikes

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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