Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why was the boy lonely? his whole family died in a plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

"Solids tunderf" he said, while chewing his gum.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Fill in the _________ Ans: Cup Posted By: Lram

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

thumb_up thumb_down +5

This is a joke. Laugh!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's Red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

thumb_up thumb_down +3

People spending hours typing nothing but cus words? Who does that?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Intel Core Computers answer robot flavored phones at middle of june CC

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Obama walks into a hospital....

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Women don't need an education. The only book they need is a recipe book.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Not a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did little Susie give to young Billy on Christmas? Genital Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mom is so nice.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A Man Walks into a Bar with a Dog. He is blind, and is promptly guided to his seat by other patrons.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between Donald Trump and a refrigerator? Open a refrigerator and you will find food, typically refrigerated food like milk, eggs, you know, stuff like that.... When you open Donald Trump you will be charged with murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops