what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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Ask me if I'm a rock. Are you a rock? No.

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your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

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roses are red violets are blue, every 1 looks at you and call u a fool

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Q: Who`s the badly treated kid at school who always faces punishment, but is inadvertently provided with recompense every single day (s)he attends class A: The poeple who fall into the category that does not encompass the people who are treated with dignity at school and never experience punishment there, but always receive some kind of reward for trying to succeed anyways.

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Society wants to be so prude and pure that on AntiJoke, you actually get words like P U S S Y and P E N I S censored !

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What's worse than waking up with a clown in your bed? Waking up with a dead clown in your bed.

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Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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What is worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? F*cking midgets

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Why did the lady have a birthmark on her leg? Because she came out of her mother's leg.

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What's red, blue & green all over?

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What's brown and sticky? A stick!

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What's the humor in an elevator? Me jumping up and down yelling we r all gonna die.

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A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender

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How do you fit 1000 babies into a trashcan? You don't that would be wasteful! You Eat Them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q. Why did Michael Jackson call Boys II Men? A. He thought it was a home delivery service.

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Why is Abraham Lincoln a bad driver? Because he is dead.

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Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

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Why was the man sad? His intestines were imploding and his head was shot off seventeen seconds ago.

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why did the black man leave his home because there was a hurricane that would have killed him if he stayed.

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Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

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roses are red, violets are blue, your boyfriends thinks i'm hot that's why he dumped you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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