What did the badger say to the mushroom? BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER MUSHROOM MUSHROOM! BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER ARGH SNAKE! IT'S A SNAKE...

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Shit, I can't think of anything to write. That does not mean I'm black

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whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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roses are red violets r blue jump off a building no one likes u

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How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Stab her with a knife.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

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Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

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What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

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A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

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Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

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What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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Hello

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Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

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One day a man was out fishing in the lake. Suddenly, there was a huge fish pulling his fishing pole so hard it almost broke. Luckily, he managed to pull the fish into his boat. It was the biggest fish he had ever caught and he brought it home for his family to see. They were all very proud.

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

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What do you call a Black Man in the ocean? A scuba diver

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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