roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

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How can you tell that the Filipino presidential candidate Grace Poe is an alien? From her extra set of retractable jaws and highly acidic body fluids.

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If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

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If a tree falls in the forest, and only a deal man is there at the time, does it make a sound? And what are his odds of not being trapped under it, awaiting rescue?

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an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

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roses are red violets are blue does this smell like chloroform

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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Whats In My Trash? Bears

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why did the chicken cross the street dude get your facts right it is the road ok well why did the chicken cross the street LEAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Who died first the cow or the cow? The Cow

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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everyone lies especially if they said agree to terms of service

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LOL

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Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

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What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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A Penn State administrator walks in to a butt.

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Nig gers Jews Bean ers and fa ggots and everyones grandma that died recently, F u c k you there all burning in Hell.

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Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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What is useless and over-payed? Our government.

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John has 58 candy bars. He eats 40, what does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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I remember this one time... I was sleeping... And all of a sudden... I woke up... Yeah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops