Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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What do silly people in a monastery say? stop munkying around.

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A man decided to commit suicide. He did.

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An old jewish man, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

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If this joke were a potato I would be very confused

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why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

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Get the FREE anti jokes app with loads and loads of anti jokes anywhere you go, even offline! All the funniest and most popular, and loads more new ones. Why not? After all, it's free! http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/hilarious-anti-jokes-lite/id438092279?mt=8&ls=1

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knock knock? who's there? a guy..... so the man open's the door and the guy clutching a knife stabs repeatedly at his chest killing him and drags his body down into his cellar locking him away from the open world. by Mad James

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Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

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What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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Why do girls like nikki minaj? Because she raps good. -Avery Vartanian

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Moral: Sure, your number is the one that ends with 853 right? Do not reply if I am right. Moral2: BECAUSE TOP COMMENT... AND SERIOUSLY, THAT NUMBER BETTER END WITH 69 AFTER I CALL YOU! DO NOT REPLY

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why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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What's the difference between an eight year old girl and a Jew? Only one comes back from camp.

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a man says "whats shakin bakin" to a friend, but his friend was shaking, because he often has seizures... thats what was shakin

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I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

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What's black, white & red all over? A cow in a slaughter house.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

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That awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it would.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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