Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

Whats worse than getting a paper-cut? Getting shot. In the head. Three times.

What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

How do you stop a bus? Throw a little child in front of it. If the driver is a loaf of bread, this phrase isn't rather important.

Whats worst then finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaus.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

A guy walked into a bar, ouch.

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

Once upon a time, there was this guy. He lived a good life and then died.

So, a Hispanic, Jewish, Asian man are on a plane. The pilot turns to them and says "Aren't you tired of this?"

Why did the man not come out of the closet? He wanted to stay in narnia.

A black man walks into a bar. His parents were immigrants from South Africa.

Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

A man walks into a bar, the bartender goes why do you have a cane? The man goes "I'm blind."

An Admiral walks into Ackbar...

Knock knock? Who's there? Set up. Set up who? Punch line!

What did the boy say 9+9 was? The Holocaust

Wow, so today is 9/11? Yes.

How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

What do you call a barrel full of monkeys? A game, you idiot.

Tom and Ralph are In a verbal scuffle. Tom: your adopted ralf! Ralph: yes! Now I have lesser chance of high blood pressure!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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