Why is the fat man fat? Because he has an extremly bad metabolism which makes him gain two pounds from eating one cheeseburger

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

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why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

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What smells worse than cow manure? Burning Jews.

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what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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What's black and is as fast as a car? A black car.

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A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

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Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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The guy told a funny joke. Why wasn't the other guy laughing? Because he was having a heart attack

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How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

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What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

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Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares what a Chicken does?

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Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

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shut up kobe!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

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Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

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Man: Doctor, everything I touch hurts. Doctor: Okay. Let's test it out by first touching your leg. Man: It hurts. Doctor: What about your arm? Man: It hurts as much. Doctor: What about your back? Man: It still hurts. Doctor: I see......your fingers are broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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