How do you get a woman out of a car? You drive it into a river and her body will float to the top.

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What happened when the black man approached a dinosaur? Nothing, for dinosaurs were eradicated from the face of the earth 135 million years ago.

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There is a wire, Let's put it on fire, The fire spread so did your legs, Now were both lying dead on your bed.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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Why did the cat bite its owner? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

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How do you get a chicken to cross the road? Get him in the other side

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Q: Imagine you are driving a boat, but the wheel falls off. So how many pancakes can you fit in that box? A: None, because the oranges couldn't talk!

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A black man, a Muslim man, and a Jewish man walk into a bar so the bartender says, "Get the f*** out."

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knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

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How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

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a kid named austin walks into school and gets kicked in the nuts byyy

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Yock

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dassa

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Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was depressed for a long time and decided to end his life by getting hit by a car.

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What smells like weed? the person who smoked it.

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What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? You poke-er--face....pokerface.

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It's porn, we all knew that, do you have something interesting to say?

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When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

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What do you call a Black man with AIDS? Unfortunate.

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Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't. It's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops