When Geese fly in their 'V' formation, why is one line bigger than the other? There's more geese in that line.

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Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

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What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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What's the difference between a Green Grocers and Fighter pilot! One flys a plane and one sells food.

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how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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Did you hear about the guy who did a backflip off the cliff? He died

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Why didnt the boy eat his ice cream? Because he is dairy intolerant

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Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

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A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

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Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

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You suck big fat slobber

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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How many pencils does it take to get an A on a test? Actually it takes knowledge.

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What is the funniest joke in the world? Written.

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a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

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A woman went outside for some fresh air.

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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

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Why is my penis so damn small? Cause the good lord made me that way

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How do you kill Chuck Norris. Shoot him in the face

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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What do you call someone who puts one number on here as a joke? Someone with no life.

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Knock Knock! EXPLOSION!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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