Dave: Heyy Steve! Steve: Oh heyy Dave! Dave: The word of the day is legs! Steve: so? Dave: So lets go back to your place and spread the word? Steve: ....How about right now? ;) Both: HEY EVERYONE..WE'RE GUNNA HAVE SEX!

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Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion.

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A Jew, A black, and a Hispanic jump off a building. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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Whats worse than a dog biting you? Cancer.

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

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Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

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I have a gay camel

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what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

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I17. I17. I17. That was my best impression of a Bingo caller.

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Have you heard the one about the monkey who jumped off the roof? Neither have I.

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What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

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If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

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Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

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How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have altzeimer's, Cheese on toast

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How many cops does it take to change a lightb- [Beaten to death by cops]

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

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What worse than finding crap on the road? Tripping over and landing on it.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you, but the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl empty and so is your head.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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A dog walk into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What"ll it be?" The dog then breaks into tears as he realizes the bartender is his father's gay husband.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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