What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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What is the difference between a lion and a tiger? A lion ,on average, weighs 31 kilograms more.

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

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What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

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Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

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Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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Why did the mailman cross the road? To deliver mail

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What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

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Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

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If Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he'd be really really old.

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Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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An owl and a squirrel where siting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl then turned to the squirrel and said nothing... cos owls can't talk. The owl then eats the bird because it is a bird of prey

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Q: Why did the Unicorn cross the road? A: It didn't Unicorns are fictional creatures.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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