Me and my friend wanted to burn some calories so we found a fat kid and lit him on fire!

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Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

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Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Antijokes?! More like Antijakes!!!

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was dead Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was stapled to the first koala

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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America were the American dream is something only foreigners believe in

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a man walks into a bar he suffer's bad injuries by Mad

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Cum on guys....gay jokes are mean

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? - nothing oceans are inanimate objects that are incapable of talking.

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Whats the next Line? YAH YAH YAH YAH YAH....

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Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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What do you call a guy who accidentally cut off his hand in a blender? Stupid.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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PEANIS!

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What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

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why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

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Why did Colussi miss 2 years of school? -Because he died

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Jovan

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Sperm enters their vagina and fertilizes an egg cell causing a child to be conceived.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops